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“My 8 year-old wants a bra!?” 😳

Can you relate to this mom’s surprise when her 8 year-old, who wasn’t yet showing signs of breast buds, asked her for a bra? She was completely thrown off by the question because she felt her kid was just so young! So she asked me, “Should I just buy her a bra even though it’s completely unnecessary?”

Let’s talk gender-affirming parenting.

Most folks who hear gender-affirming parenting will automatically think of parents whose kids are experiencing gender dysphoria. However, gender-affirming parenting applies to every parent who is aiming to create a safe and comfortable home environment for their children to feel supported in expressing their authentic gender identity. This may align with their perceived gender at birth or may not.

For this mom, her child’s growth and development were moving in the direction of cisgender - meaning her gender identity was aligning with her assigned sex at birth. Her daughter was asking for a bra because she sees older girls and women wearing bras and aspires to wear one as well because her gender identity associates the gender norms and stereotypes of bras as a woman’s item of clothing and she sees herself as becoming a woman.

Is 8 years-old too young to start wearing bras?

You know, I rarely say yes or no to a question but instead offer you a variety of considerations so you can make an informed decision. We could spend the next 20 minutes talking about: